The cliche, nice guys finish last, has become a reoccurring concept in my career, relationship and life. I recognize I must overcome some nice guy tendencies I've developed, despite it's counter-intuitiveness. I have chosen a extremely competitive and highly adversarial career. Being a lawyer requires sternness and confidence. A reason lawyers have become so despised is because these are inherent characteristics of the job. If a lawyer doesn't develop this these traits they will quickly lose respect in the legal community.
Thus far, I have found this to be true within relationships. I am not advocating being an asshole to women, or friends. However, when you become the "yes man", you eventually lose credibly and your kind nature will turn you subservient. Succumbing to others wishes continuously will garnishing your dignity and dilute your identity. Confident people are admired and respected, subservients are treated as such.
I have been writing for weeks about my successful three years in Charlotte. I am leaving the city a more mature, well-rounded and well-versed person. I cannot say the same for all of my excursions. I did make glaring mistakes. I cannot definitively say that I am anywhere close to where I need to be. My original goal was not to move for three years, learn about myself and move on. I desired to integrate into society, develop a local presences and establish a career. As I drove into work today, I saw the pink building that overlooked my old apartment. It doesn't take a genius to realize that a failed relationship was a factor in my decision to move. If I would have landed the a job in the District Attorney's Office or a local law firm, I also quite possibly would not be in this situation.
I reckon it's the perfect time to move North. It will be the summer, the best time to move into Ohio. The potential to secure a sought after legal position is a motivational factor. I have friends, family and new acquaintances that will guide me through the process with my interest at heart. I have their interest at my heart. The mistakes I made in Charlotte must be corrected up North or I will become a victim of the same fate. I will become an increasingly progressive human being, but I will never overcome Wednesday.
I write this blog on the eve of my first trip to Europe. Although this trip was planned just weeks ago, the timing is not coincidental. I am leaving a mere few days after my twenty-ninth birthday. I always believed I would make the trip overseas before turning thirty and that will soon become a reality. The trip is due to take place in a transitional period in my life. I've spent the last year dedicated to relearning history, traveling to new places and tracing roots. I have the ability to culminate those concepts into one superb week and hopefully gain inspiration to write new material. I see symbolism in the trip as I enter a new adventurist stage in my life. I will not submit to false notions that life becomes less exciting as we ascend through its stages.